How to be an Olympic gardener
Hello m' golden Zeuses,
A brief insight into the day in a life of an olmypic gardener...
1) I promise to Zeus that I have trained for the past ten months by doing as much tea drinking, seed planting and weeding as possible.
2) My fellow budding athletes and I paint our nails gold, silver and bronze, only to have them promptly destroyed by further outdoor sportsmanship (mostly trampolining and dirt digging).
3) A succulent shrine is constructed as an offering to Zeus.
(The creature is a nod to Athena's mechanical owl, in the 1981 film Clash of the Titans)
4) Poseidon, annoyed at all the attention Zeus is getting with the Games, angrily brandishes his trident. Together they battle out in the bay, where sea meets sky, thus creating Storm Evert. Despite my frantic attempts to stake the sunflowers in torrential rain, one sunflower is defeated in the 70 miles per hour howling winds. Two ancient urns take a tumble, but recover.
Poseidon's not at home but he has littered his abode with all manner of shells.
This guy! Talk about shell bling...
6) A mysterious cat appears and tells us to seek out the wisdom within the abyss.
Uneasily, we make the descent into the pit.
7) Down in the abyss, there is Giant Gunnerera, Tree Ferns, Crocosmia and the false promise of bananas -
A strange blue light emits from a blocked off cave. It tells us what must be done.
8) Back home at Long Mizzle, we make the required offerings to Poseidon:
shells filled with gritty compost, cacti and succulents. They are strung up on the buddleja arch.
9) Now both Zeus and Poseidon are appeased, the garden blooms happily.
Dahlia 'Spanish Dancer'
Above: Sweet Peas
Great fun post, Lulu. It's good to know that the gods seem to be appeased! I have been potting on a largish hydrangea into a bigger pot this afternoon. Another two to do, but I think I may need to source bigger pots. I may have just bought another hydrangea to add to the collection...
ReplyDeleteBest wishes and Happy Gardening
Ellie
Thank you Ellie :) Good to hear you are appeasing the Hydrangea gods with bigger pots and more to the collection ! I've just spotted your hydrangea post so I shall be popping over to have a proper look shorty.... Lulu xXx
Deletelovely, fun post - dear lulu! <3
ReplyDeletethank you for cheering up a dark from rain clouds sunday morning......
your garden looks beautiful - no wonder with all the olympic power goes into it :-D once i had crocosmia but fear they are a victim of the voles like most of my spring bulbs. sorry for the sunflower! your dahlia bed with "fuchsschwanz" and "kapuzinerkresse" is looking glam with all the deep red tones.
love gyllyngdune gardens - thanks for taking us with you esp. to that bizarr grotto! here - "around the corner" of the BWH is an old quarry that screams to be transformed into such a fantastic sunken garden too...... the property includes a pretty little manor house with a park like front garden - all empty, overgrown and blocked up because no one of the youngsters has the heart to put the work into it. sad.
totally love your succulent planted sea shells!!
xxxxx
Thank you Beate :) Ahh, the BWH voles strike again! Who would have thought crocosmia bulbs would be so tasty for them! The orange Crocosmia is considered to be a bit of a weed in Cornwall, and it can often be found at the side of roads and hedge rows. Oh what a shame your local quarry hasn't been nurtured into a garden. I wonder what type of stone was extracted and what it was used for (?) It is becoming increasingly rare and expensive to buy old quarries over here. Lulu xXx
Deletedid answer your question but something went wrong with the i-net....
Deleteso again: its sandstone here - used for everthing in our region - drywalls, basements and corniches (the BWH!), whole houses, pavements, troughs.....
and for stately houses as far as in berlin and hamburg. best example for the use: https://bahnwaerterhaeuschen.blogspot.com/2019/08/10-hochzeitstag.html
xx
Oh wow! The Dresden Zwinger is stunning!!! What a fine example of sandstone. Thanks for the link Beate, I really enjoyed seeing it :) xXx
DeleteWhat a fabulously creative post! That storm was pretty bad wasn’t it? Looks as though you made it through relatively unscathed, save for the sunflower. What gorgeous sunflowers by the way! Love the shell structure - a Birmingham resident has recently unearthed a shell clad Victorian folly at the bottom of his garden whilst clearing the area. Planting succulents in shells and hanging them in the garden is a brilliant idea I have to say. I think another trip to the coast for us might be in order! xxx
ReplyDeleteThank you Claire :) If it's not the mutant slugs it's usually a storm that gets the sunflowers :0 How exciting for the Birmingham resident to unearth a shell folly!!! I would not be able to contend with those levels of excitement! Lulu xXx
DeleteP.S My Olympics viewing has so far been limited to the skateboarding. Gareth skated back in the day and our son had a dalliance with the sport when he was younger. He got quite good until he had a fall in one of the big bowls - it’s brutal. Those 13 year old girls make it look so easy! xx
ReplyDeleteThe skate boarding girls are just fab aren't they! Almost makes me want to try it (not the stunts though! - just staying on a board and going forwards would be a major achievement). I can see how a fall would put someone off :0 x
DeleteLulu you are so lovely. Every post I read of yours makes me smile...Those shells that you planted up look amazing you clever girl. Do you eat the seeds of the Amaranthus? I haven't got a sporting bone in my body and couldn't give a fig about Olympic medals... I'm a total philistine I know.
ReplyDeleteThank you m' Cherie :) Do you know, watching sport makes me think 'ooh, that looks like good fun, maybe I should give it a go'... then I promptly pop t' kettle on and have some more tea and biscuits. Those 'super food' amaranths seeds look a bit healthy don't they! It is the first year I have grown them. Maybe I should sprinkle some on my porridge ?... Lulu xXx
DeleteFor some unknown reason part of your post made me think of Lord of the Flies! there is a shell grotto near here - Margate I think, I have always been meaning to have a look. Your shell grotto looks positively supernatural with that creepy blue light! I think your gardening olympics are brilliant.
ReplyDeleteHow funny Betty, it is the conch shell association? and us savages? I have heard of Margate's shell grotto - quite a big one by all accounts. That would be really interesting to see. When I first visited Falmouth, I was able to go into the bottom cave, now with the blue light, but it has been since blocked off for safety reasons (either that or it turned into a special brew lair :0). Lulu xXx
DeleteI'm loving this! The Olympic nails are fantastic and I love your nod to Clash of the Titans' mechanical owl - I wanted a pet one!
ReplyDeleteLong Mizzle is looking fabulous - sad about the sunflowetr mishap though!
I'd love a shell grotto. Like Claire commented, they've unearthed one in a garden in posh edgbaston in Birmingham. The owner had forgotten it was there and had quite a surprise when he got some work done (how the other half live!)
BMX is winning for me. Walsall's had quite a few Olympians in the past (it's either rock stardom or sport when you live in a crap town), I think Ben Whittaker's tipped to get gold (to match his hair) in the boxing. xxx
I always wanted a pet golden mechanical owl too Vix! Plus a blinking ship's figurehead (Jason and the Argonauts). I am just trying to imagine the conversation of the Birmingham resident - " Well I simply forgot that I had a authentic Victorian shell grotto at the bottom of the garden..." :0 :0 :) The BMXing was thrilling. Crap towns are great for music and sporting ambition! Lulu xXx
DeleteCongratulations on your success in helping Britain to gold! A fun post - so much so my tea went cold while I was reading and getting lost in your words. All good wishes.
ReplyDeleteThank you Mike, yes it was a proud moment ;) :0 :) Sorry to make your tea go cold. Hope you were able to whip up another pot, or stick it in the microwave for 30 seconds. Lulu xXx
DeleteBrilliant! I too need to make god appeasing succulent planters - they please the eye greatly!
ReplyDeleteThank you Kate, yes you should, you should :) Lulu xXx
DeleteI LOVED my Olympic experience! You look like you had a great time!
ReplyDeleteDid you FIND those shells? They are beautiful!
Before I forget, thank you so much for your advice on Penny's. I'll definitely have a look. We are currently in Portreath (actually, the live location is a traffic jam on the way to Mousehole!).
Yesterday, we went to Padstow for the day (lunch at St Petroc's Bistro! Thanks Rick!)
and we parked on a residential road and an older gent was going to ask us if we could move up a bit but I charmed him with my flattery of his garden and my extensive knowledge of flower names! He mentioned Echiums and I, remembering your post, asked him if they were those purple spiky things, which he said Yes to and told me where there were some to see in Padstow! I was really happy to see some in real life! Later, when we came back, he was looking out for me and waved and asked if I'd found the Echiums. It was so nice!
Hiya Kezzie, unfortunately those are not Cornish beach found shells. I think my mam found them at various car boot sales. I had been wondering what to do with them all :0 I wonder if you made it safely to Mousehole in all that traffic (don't forget to call it Mow-zel or the locals will scoff at you!) and maybe grabbed yourself some Stargazy Pie and a pint? Gardeners can usually be tamed with plant speak. We are very proud of our Tree Echiums in these parts. Olde Penny's Vintage Tea Room in Portreath is a real delight and the tea ladies in there are so lovely. Hope you are having a wonderful week, Lulu xXx
DeleteI do indeed know to call it Mowzel. I know this because I actually sang in the animated film version of The Mousehole Cat when I was 11- we sang the traditional song, "A merry place you may believe was Mousehole on Tom Bawcock's eve, to be there then, who wouldn't wish to duo on seven sorts of fish..." and later it goes on about Starry-Gazy pie' in a later verse! Sadly, I didn't have a chance to eat Starry-Gazy pie!
DeleteSUP, not Duo!
DeleteThat's amazing Kezzie!!! I am going to listen out for you singing next time I see it! :) :) :) x
DeleteP.S.. Love the Shell grotto!
ReplyDeleteThanks m' luverly x
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